Category Archives: Uncategorized

It seems that shame is often misinterpreted as conscience, which is a sense of moral responsibility people have in front of other people or society. In Greece there was Aidos, goddess of Shame, Modesty, Respect, Reverence, and Humility. She was meant to restrain people from doing wrong. There are sociopaths, people who lack the abilityContinue reading “Shame and “The Tale of Abu Hasan and the Fart””

As I am preparing my free online mini-course on Toxic Shame I am learning more and more about shame and how disproportionately and inadequately we devalue ourselves and how serious are the consequences of it. Shame is a very painful emotion, it brings loss of self-esteem and requires reclaiming and healing our identity. It harborsContinue reading “Shame, Guilt, Contempt”

Just watched Moana for the first time and got inspired to write some thoughts. It is shown that the heart of Te Fiti (goddess/mother island) was stolen by Maui (man/son) who got tired of not being enough for mortals.   We have this misconception about love that we need to give our hearts away to beContinue reading “Lost or stolen heart”

Dr. Paul Ekman states that shame and guilt are all about meeting expectations. These are social or moral emotions. Shame: I did not meet my own standards and expectations.Guilt: I did not meet your standards and expectations. Shame focuses on who one is, while guilt focuses on what one has done. People who experience shameContinue reading “Shame and guilt”

Why are emotional or spiritual routines important?  Because they increase our vitality, life energy and give us clarity.  When we are full of healthy energy we are able to work on our life projects. Think of solar lights. They will not be able to produce light without getting energy from the sun.  They would notContinue reading “Why do physical, emotional and spiritual routines alone do not get us where we want?  “

Often suffering is associated with the past or the future. The past is often associated with regrets about mistakes we made or with great things we used to have.  And the future is associated with anxieties and hopes.  Anxiety about the future and that it will bring only negative things.  And hopes, fantasies, magical thinking thatContinue reading “How is it possible to live in the present, in the here and now?”

How do you find an insight about a problem? How do you find it on your own?Without the help of a guide, a consultant or a coach? How do you find that missing puzzle you are looking for?  Through Journaling? Meditating? Conscious dancing? Listening to music? Being in nature? Traveling? Through literature or poetry? IContinue reading “How do you find that missing puzzle you are looking for?”

Many people go to deep coaches or guides because the guide is helping them to see the inner conflict, the value of themselves and their inner world. And the guide is helping to establish the contact with part of self that is unseen or unowned. When the contact is established the client can easily findContinue reading “Who do I work with?”

Experiencing difficult emotions, such as fear, anger, sadness, guilt, shame, envy and jealousy is a normal part of life. — vikacoaching However, few people know how to process these emotions and support themselves during challenging times. As a result, people make wrong decision in life that entail long-term negative consequences. As a psychodynamic life coach,Continue reading “My approach to psychodynamic (deep) coaching”

My name is Victoriya (Vika) Makrishcheva. I was born in the Soviet Union and witnessed its collapse in 1991. The collapse produced massive socio-economic disparities, impoverishing millions of families, including mine. To survive, I dropped out of high-school and sold home-made slippers in a street market. This difficult experience sparked my interest in economics. Hence,Continue reading “Introducing Myself”